Money like water

Facial wash dah nak habis.
Moisturizer pun.
Stock contact lenses dah nak habis (I can only wear daily disposable ones).
Teringin nak pakai Body Shop's Oceanus semula.
Mascara dah lama habis.
Fave black kohl pun sama.

All the above need money, but I simply don't know where my money's gone to.


Oh wait.


I bought 3 pairs of shoes in the past few weeks.


-___-'



Note to self: Carry out shoes inventory.


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13kg and Counting

Two reasons why I loved being warded for dengue:

1. Amazing weight loss
I lost about 6kg because I wasn't eating much the whole six days I was in the hospital (plus the first three-days I was bed-ridden at home). No matter how tantalizing the hospital food is (haha), if you're a patient and you are attached to an IV drip, don't count on seeing the food being touched. Even Gordon Ramsay/Anna Olson/Rachel Ray will spectacularly fail at this task.
I'm about 55kg now (I was at my heaviest when I was an undergraduate - superflabby at 68kg), and I intend to make it stay there at the 55kg mark. Now I'm trying hard to eat in moderation (and avoid late-night snacking). Exercising is still such a hard thing for me, heh.

2. Change of pace
It has been a mundane work-home-work-home routine for me since I started working in July 2010. It goes without saying that contracting dengue and being warded for it allowed me to slow down and simply do nothing. I'm on leave until Saturday, and I start work again on Monday. I'm excited to go back to work, because I'm getting two new 20-inch computer monitors! So much easier not having to squint while browsing through the blogshops reading the PDF patent files.

One single reason why I hated being warded for dengue:

It was a horrible, sickly feeling, being hooked up to an IV drip, every second of the day. Having to buzz for the nurse every single time I wanna go pee felt awful (although they do get paid to tend to me), and bathroom trips were a definite surety - there's an IV drip, remember? I kept waking up in the middle of the night. I kept getting poked at with needles (for daily blood tests). I was in a state of self-neglect that I was silently cursing those student nurses who kept waltzing in and out of my room smelling all flowery and nice. I only showered once every 2 days. I felt filthy, but there's nothing I could do. I was too weak to even raise my hands to take off my PJs.

p/s: I'm flying solo now, haha.

That Swell in Your Heart

That swell in your heart.

That alien, dull, indescribable ache,

that leaves you short of breath.

Like your chest cavity is filled to the brim,

with something that you can't pinpoint,

what it exactly is.

It happens everytime,

he says 'I miss you',

or when you simply think of him.

You fight,

you feel that dull ache.

You merajuk,

you feel that dull ache.

You make-up,

you feel that dull ache.

How do you know for sure,

that the ache comes from your heart?

You don't.

But everytime you think of him,

that ache comes,

your heart thuds slower,

and it feels heavy.

Heavy, with that feeling,

you simply can't describe.
That dull ache.

That swell in your heart.

picture credit here